Narcissistic Personality Disorder may soon be dropped from the current Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Why? Essentially because it's now considered just a manifestation of normal personality. But here is the problem - dropping it from the manual is essentially throwing in the towel and waving a white flag where self-centeredness exists. It will basically be telling our culture it's OKAY to be a narcissist, just not an extreme one - well, not for now anyway.
We have become such a society of me, me, me. The minute our feet hit the floor in the morning it's - "how do I feel?" "I need a cup of coffee." "What do I feel like doing today?" "Which outfit should I wear?" And it only gets worse as the day wears on. "I'm hungry, I'm thirsty, I'm tired, I'm bored, I'm lonely, I'm rich, I'm poor, I'm fat, I'm thin, I'm just right, I'm smart, I'm dumb," etc. It's not necessarily what we are, it's that we're constantly thinking of ourselves in every thought throughout the day.
Now one would think that a culture filled with people looking for self-gratification would be brimming with lots of self-fulfilled, satisfied people. But they couldn't be more wrong. Our culture is actually brimming with divorce, drug use, spousal abuse, child abuse, alchoholism, crime, suicide, etc. There is just one problem with the theory that self-gratification leads to self-fulfillment. Self. We cannot look to ourselves for any kind of gratification or fulfilment. It's impossible. Our fulfillment comes from the One who created us and gave us our purpose to begin with - God. And He created us to bring Him glory. So how could we be fulfillers of our own desires? Wouldn't we then be giving ourselves the glory? But we weren't created for that purpose. And when we don't fulfill our purpose we end up with a society full of miserable, misguided people looking for happiness in all the wrong places.
Then there are those who believe that helping others will bring them happiness. After all, they've taken the focus off of themselves and placed it on others. Or have they? We look to their motivation and often find they are patting themselves on the back for a job well done - whether publicly or privately. And the happiness is fleeting.
Our goal is not to do good on this Earth. Our goal is to do God's will and then give Him the glory. And by doing that we no longer puff ourselves up thinking we are "good" when in fact, we are fallen. When we are in the center of God's will, we have a sense of peace and joy. We can know that we are fulfilling our purpose on this Earth by bringing Him glory. It means we have truly taken the focus off of ourselves and placed it on God, who will then guide us to those He wants us to serve.
We don't need to "know ourselves" - at least not the way all the self-help books and programs tell us we should. By listening to them we only continue to put ourselves in the center of our world. Jesus is the one we truly need to know and place in the center of our lives. He will then help us to know his Father. And it is He who knows us better than we could ever know ourselves. God created us to bring Him glory and with a purpose in mind. He will guide us to accomplish that purpose if we allow Him.
We have become such a society of me, me, me. The minute our feet hit the floor in the morning it's - "how do I feel?" "I need a cup of coffee." "What do I feel like doing today?" "Which outfit should I wear?" And it only gets worse as the day wears on. "I'm hungry, I'm thirsty, I'm tired, I'm bored, I'm lonely, I'm rich, I'm poor, I'm fat, I'm thin, I'm just right, I'm smart, I'm dumb," etc. It's not necessarily what we are, it's that we're constantly thinking of ourselves in every thought throughout the day.
Now one would think that a culture filled with people looking for self-gratification would be brimming with lots of self-fulfilled, satisfied people. But they couldn't be more wrong. Our culture is actually brimming with divorce, drug use, spousal abuse, child abuse, alchoholism, crime, suicide, etc. There is just one problem with the theory that self-gratification leads to self-fulfillment. Self. We cannot look to ourselves for any kind of gratification or fulfilment. It's impossible. Our fulfillment comes from the One who created us and gave us our purpose to begin with - God. And He created us to bring Him glory. So how could we be fulfillers of our own desires? Wouldn't we then be giving ourselves the glory? But we weren't created for that purpose. And when we don't fulfill our purpose we end up with a society full of miserable, misguided people looking for happiness in all the wrong places.
Then there are those who believe that helping others will bring them happiness. After all, they've taken the focus off of themselves and placed it on others. Or have they? We look to their motivation and often find they are patting themselves on the back for a job well done - whether publicly or privately. And the happiness is fleeting.
Our goal is not to do good on this Earth. Our goal is to do God's will and then give Him the glory. And by doing that we no longer puff ourselves up thinking we are "good" when in fact, we are fallen. When we are in the center of God's will, we have a sense of peace and joy. We can know that we are fulfilling our purpose on this Earth by bringing Him glory. It means we have truly taken the focus off of ourselves and placed it on God, who will then guide us to those He wants us to serve.
We don't need to "know ourselves" - at least not the way all the self-help books and programs tell us we should. By listening to them we only continue to put ourselves in the center of our world. Jesus is the one we truly need to know and place in the center of our lives. He will then help us to know his Father. And it is He who knows us better than we could ever know ourselves. God created us to bring Him glory and with a purpose in mind. He will guide us to accomplish that purpose if we allow Him.
Thank you for writing this! A great reminder to stop pursuing self and commit to pursuing God. Maybe one reason our culture has become so self-centered is because we think it's either happiness OR God. Society says either I am happy and pursuing my own desires OR I am living for God, working away in drone-like existence. But in actuality, isn't the opposite is true?
ReplyDeleteAs a believer I still struggle to ignore the lies of the enemy and remind myself that God does not banish happiness for us, but wants His children to find fullness of joy in HIM. (Psalms 32:11, Psalms 16:11)
And like you stated, instead of pursuing self awareness constantly, we are much better off pursuing God awareness, and He will reveal to us what we need to know about ourselves, as we need to know it. (which is good because knowing all of ourselves all at once could be quite overwhelming :)) Insightful article!